Friday, October 19, 2012

Columbia Minerva Awesomeness

Blogging at times can be difficult.  It can be tough to find good material to comment on - especially if your log has a very narrow focus.

Then there are the rare moments like this when blogging mana seems to fall from the Internet heavens.  Such is the post today.  This one pic richly deserves to have a post all of its own for it is truly blogging gold uncovered from the world of Internet mining, preserved here for all posterity.

I strongly suggest that you do not look directly at the pic all at once.  There is simply too much and it will overload your senses.  Instead start at the left and SLOWLY work your way to the right - for each outfit needs to be fully appreciated on its own merits before moving on.

I am not personally familiar with Columbia Minerva.  Apparently it was a rag that showed you how to sew your own totally rad 70s style clothes.  People did that alot back then to save money, That is before we had our clothes made in overseas sweatshops for nearly free.

And yes this is real.  This is not photo shopped.  This is 70s fashion at its finest.

If you are not laughing hysterically now you are either: a) a heartless, soulless cyborg, b) comatose, or c) someone who actually wore one of these outfits to school and was socially scarred for life. Where, oh where, do we begin. 

Let's start at the left.  And yes, that is Shelley Hack in pre Charlie's Angels days boldly modeling something called "El Gaucho" (shouldn't it be "la gaucha" or maybe "gotcha" as in "gotcha to wear something ridiculous"?).  I am from the rural plains states, and I have known actual cowboys and cowgirls and I have NEVER seen any of them in any outfit REMOTELY like this.  It looks gay even on a good looking girl. 

I'm not sure what the point of the just-past-the-knees pants are but I doubt seriously that they would hold up in actual brush country.  And what does any aspiring vaquero (vaquera?) needs to match her blindingly white cowboy hat?  That would be equally blindingly white, plastic, sorta-kinda cowboy boots!

Next up is our favorite 70s model Kathy in "Peasantry".  Hmmm, I always thought that girls wanted to be princesses, not peasants.  Perhaps it was worn to PLAY peasant like Marie Antoinette did.

Kathy actually pulls this off and looks pretty hot.  You can almost picture her on a covered wagon heading our west in late 1800s.  "Katherine, we'll homestead here on this godforsaken, windswept 40 acre plot.  You plow the fields, clean the sod house, raise the young 'ens, while I stand here guarding for injuns and admiring your figure in that smoking hot peasant dress!".  Also, apparently peasants wore the same white, plastic go-go boots that cowboys do in this alternative universe of fashion.

And that brings us to the Pièce de résistance, the "medieval".  What can I say more than what the picture says about itself.  What poor, demented creature would wear this in public?  Maybe to a Dungeons and Dragons role playing session, but even in that world you would probably get the crap beat out of you for showing up as Friar Tuck in crochet!  Once again, apparently white, plastic go-go boots were as popular in the 1100s as they were in the 1800s and 1970s!

Look again and laugh again for this is the pic that keeps on giving and giving!

1 comment:

  1. While I will shamefully admit that I wore gouchos, never crocheted ones! I agree, Kathy is the only one that can pull off this look!